January 24, 2018 at 9:56 pm #22425
I had my procedure in June 2017, and we are now 8 weeks pregnant! 🙂 I would really like to do a natural childbirth, and found a midwife in a birthing center near a hospital with an Ob partner on standby that seems like a great fit. I told her about vaginismus though and she said that while she’s familiar with it, she’s never assisted a mom who used to have it.
Any former patients had success with this? Any tips/pointers for having an unmedicated birth after vaginismus? I feel like I’ve come SUCH a long way…I even had my first successful Ob appointment yesterday and was fairly calm. All we did was the ultrasound, and she let me insert it myself initially, but that’s still HUGE progress from not being able to work with the smallest dilator.
I also saw an inflatable dilator that you can use in the weeks leading up to birth that you inflate to become closer to 10cm, then “push” out, so that you can become slightly more accustomed gradually to the sensation of stretching and pushing from birth. Curious if anyone has done this?
Just would like to avoid an epidural, but would also like to avoid episiotomy or a relapse in vaginismus.January 25, 2018 at 12:46 pm #22426
Nicole Tammelleo, MA, LCSWModerator
Congratulations on your pregnancy, that is very exciting news! You have come such a long way, and I can only imagine how excited you must be about the pregnancy, and being able to have pain free intercourse, and an ultrasound. Those are really big accomplishments! We have worked with many women who has been able to have medication free deliveries, and I have never heard of a relapse in vaginismus. I think working with an OB you trust is a great start, and many patients have loved pre-natal yoga classes, and felt they were very helpful in avoiding episiotimies.
All the best,
NicoleJanuary 25, 2018 at 3:47 pm #22429
This is such a great post, and hopefully some of our participants might be able to give some insight in their experience.
I do think a natural vaginal delivery is absolutely possible. I think using a midwife is a great idea.
I would do the prep with the inflatable dilator, sounds like a really helpful tool.
I did have one patient visit with a physical therapist to ensure that the pelvic floor was not too tense prior to delivery, and she found that extremely helpful.January 26, 2018 at 12:08 pm #22431
Thank you both! That is very encouraging to hear!January 28, 2018 at 5:05 pm #22433
Newlywed, just wanted to say congrats on the pregnancy! I haven’t been pregnant but am really excited to hear how it goes for you, especially as someone who’s interested in having kids someday. If you’ve overcome vaginismus, I’m confident that you can do this!January 30, 2018 at 4:16 pm #22445
CONGRATULATIONS! 🙂 I know everything will go well. I don’t have experience with this, but I second recessivegenequeen – I’d love to hear how it goes, and I know you can do this! I read some other posts about successful pregnancies after vaginismus, and Nicole & Melissa’s tips seem great 🙂 Happy to hear about the successful ultrasound. GOOD LUCK!April 12, 2018 at 10:34 am #22812
I am 6 month married. But no intercourse… I try dilator but not able to insert .. What i do?April 12, 2018 at 11:32 am #22813
Nicole Tammelleo, MA, LCSWModerator
Hello Kelly 88,
I am sorry to hear you are struggling with having intercourse. It sounds like it would be best to get medical attention. Here is a list of specialists that could be helpful to you:
Most women find they need help through process, and using dilators alone is very difficult. If you are in the NYC are, we are here to help as well.
Take good care,
NicoleApril 12, 2018 at 2:51 pm #22814
Yes i live in ManhattanDecember 5, 2018 at 11:29 pm #24012
Following up post-baby: I did it! He was 9lbs and had a head circumference in the 97th percentile, and the only meds/assistance I had was a partial dose of lidocaine injected st the entry muscles after I was running out of energy to push (first time mom…30 hour labor starting after the work day…I remember exhaustion way more than any pain or discomfort). I didn’t even require stitches afterward. Totally doable, and I loved the experience.
I saw a pelvic floor physical therapist a few times during pregnancy, which was helpful in boosting my confidence for labor and knowing which exercises to do instead of just doing standard kegels. Also, the lidocaine at the end was a brilliant move by my midwife…I’d pushed for 6 hours, and his head was out after one push once she gave me just a tiny bit of lidocaine injected into the right spot.
All that just to say, if anyone wants an unmedicated birth post-vaginismus, it is totally doable (and our sex life has been WAY better since).December 10, 2018 at 12:03 pm #24037
You. Are. AWESOME!
I’m so impressed! Such a happy ending that lots of us on the forum love to hear!
Huge props to you! And unmedicated, too! WOW! Enjoy being an awesome MOM <3!December 11, 2018 at 7:50 am #24039
Newlywed, huge congratulations to you on your new baby! As a former vaginismus sufferer, it’s crazy to read something like this and see how far someone can come. Your story is about as radical as they come (especially given the circumference of your son’s head!) and I think I can speak for a lot of people when I say how encouraging it is to see someone who has overcome vaginismus so fully and can even say they have a better sex life post-baby. Thanks for letting us know how it all went and best wishes for your family and your son!!!December 11, 2018 at 5:53 pm #24057
Jennifer Dembo, LMSWModerator
Congrats, newlywed – what an amazing triumph!
As a doula and childbirth educator, I can tell you that feelings around vaginismus and childbirth are very similar.
A good starting point to that connection might be this: our bodies are designed to stretch and move. Muscles, skin – even bones. Now, what’s MEANT to be doesn’t always describe the whole picture, of course. We experience obstacles such as injury, stress, illnesses – sometimes even inexplicable conditions that lead to things like tight muscles. And we can’t volunteer a specific muscle for an involuntary tension adventure, so sometimes it’s our back or neck or hamstring or, in some cases, our vagina. Now, the vagina tends to be a more emotionally charged body part than any of these others, as we all know. So treatment at Congtythamtu incorporates a mind/body approach that is customized for each and every patient. Just as shoulder spasms heal, so does vaginismus, with patience, support, perseverance and belief in your inner strength.
Keep up the good work, Everyone – no matter where you are in your experience. If we at Congtythamtu can be of any help along the way, don’t hesitate to reach out!
You must be logged in to reply to this topic.