Making Peace with Vaginismus

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  • #20777

    One of the things I hear over and over again from vaginismus patients is that they feel damaged or abnormal. Even after all of the hard work they have done to overcome vaginismus, many have the fear that it will come back. I think trying to “make peace” with vaginismus” is very important to the healing process. This is not your fault, there is nothing you did to cause this, and you are not being punished. When those negative automatic thoughts about vaginismus start to enter your thoughts, try and find a phrase or mantra that helps your feel in control, and at peace with your vaginismus. Some examples patients have used include ” peaceful vagina,” and “vaginsmus no more.” Anything that can help you heal your psychological battle with vaginismus will benefit both the mind and the body over time.

    #20785

    Great post, Nicole.

    It really speaks to the need for vaginismus treatment to not just be about physical changes, but also addressing the painful emotional aspect as well.

    #20901
    mm
    Helen Leff, LMSW
    Moderator

    I recently spoke with a woman with vaginismus who wanted me to understand that her fear was overwhelming and felt bigger than her “pain”. She did the Botox procedure and is doing much better physically and slowly healing emotionally. Finding a mantra as Nicole suggests is a great idea – connecting mind and body is necessary in overcoming vaginismus.

    #20909
    recessivegenequeen
    recessivegenequeen
    Participant

    This was such a huge part of my treatment of vaginismus for me – becoming okay with the fact that I’d been suffering with vaginismus for so long. It was unfair and painful, but you will start to heal much faster when you let go of the resentment of the past. Sure, I wish I had not had years of sexual self-doubt, but I’m fortunate now to have so many years ahead of me to have new experiences and to live free from shame. Part of making peace is learning to look forward instead of looking back.

    #20983
    mm
    Heather34
    Moderator

    This is such a great post. I, too, held on to so much resentment even after I was physically healed. I was upset emotionally that it took so long to find the Botox treatment. Once I learned to let this go, it helped me to feel so much lighter and better overall.

    #21336
    mm
    Helen Leff, LMSW
    Moderator

    It’s so important not to dismiss the power of our minds. I love the idea of a mantra to affirm ourselves and feel at peace.

    #21337

    “making peace is learning to look forward instead of looking back”

    love this!!

    #21796

    Gatoxistem
    Participant

    I love this forum, it really speaks womanhood and it has a big help to everyone.

    #21956

    Hello Gatoxistem,

    Thanks so much for joining the forum. Glad to know it has been helpful!

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