No sex for a year.

Here is a piece from the Huffington Post Blog that I thought should be discussed. The writer says that she and her husband had no sex at all for a year after her baby was born and it all worked out fine — and her relationship didn’t suffer. So I sat on this piece for a few …

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Newlywed’s guide to intimacy.

In my work at the Center I frequently see “Torah observant” women who are struggling with sexual and relationship issues in a new marriage. They are from a community where certain rules and rituals must be observed. A new book called The Newlywed’s Guide to Physical Intimacy has just come out by Jennie Rosenfeld, PhD …

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Seeing vaginismus everywhere.

My husband claims I see vaginismus everywhere. Okay. Maybe he’s right. Maybe I do…it kills me. When I see a woman who is totally avoidant of relationships I suspect she is fearful of penetration. When I see a young girl fearful of tampons, I suspect she is panicked at the idea of putting something inside. …

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Adversity and desire.

It happens all the time. A tearful, distraught woman sits down and informs us that: Her husband is leaving her/has left her. Her husband is having/was having an affair. She believes this is due to the fact that they haven’t had sex in (you fill in the blank: 6 months, 1 year, 2 years, 5 …

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A good day at our center.

Someone once asked me what makes a good day at our center. Today is one of those days. Today I got an email with a copy of a baby picture from a patient who struggled for 2 years with vaginismus. She is fine, having great sex and has a beautiful little baby girl to prove …

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Two truths.

We saw a patient yesterday who made me think about two truths…one I had already “known” or at least had been conscious of; the other, not so much. The patient is a lively, beautiful mother of a 10 year old girl. She came to us two years ago because of her lack of libido — she …

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“The Cookie Sutra.”

Every once in a while a book comes out that makes us smile. The Cookie Sutra is one of them. Written with a witty tongue-in-cheek style with adorable pictures of gingerbread men and women in a variety of compromising positions, this book would make a really fun gift. As the cover states, this is the …

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But things weren’t always like this….

If I had a nickel every time a woman told me about her sexual situation with her husband and concluded with, “But it was never like that,” I would be a wealthy woman. After being married for 10 or 15 years, people compare what is going on in their relationship currently with what it was …

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Desire and depression.

Sometimes, when women come into the center with low desire we talk to them about anti=depressants. The reaction isn’t always good: “You think I’m depressed? I’mhere to talk about my lack of sex drive!” Life situations and hormones can play a role in depression. Serotonin, the hormone normally associated with depression, isn’t the only culprit. …

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