Fantasies… Fantasies… Fantasies…

When I fantasize about something, does that mean that I really want that thing to happen? (I get asked this all the time!) NO. No. And no. All it means is that you like to fantasize about that activity/act/event. Now, very commonly women get upset about their fantasies because they think that they are not …

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What is your Private Sexual Fantasy?

We all have sexual fantasies, and most of us also have private sexual fantasies. Sometimes these private fantasies include degrading or violent acts that we do not actually want to play out in real life. However, these private fantasies turn us on and get us aroused.  Many women feel guilty that they have these private …

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Tensing your body during sex.

Tensing your body during sex can either be a means to generating pleasure or a reaction to experiencing pain. If you’re interested in learning about tensing your body due to pain, read our blog on that topic. However, if you’re tensing your body because sex is pleasurable, read on.  It seems that part of having …

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Spicing up your sex life.

The trick for keeping a long-term sexual relationship interesting is essentially giving it some attention! Think about it. The reality is that everyone needs something a bit different in their sex life and there is no “one-size fits all”. The more you actually spend time THINKING about what would spice up your sex life, the …

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Fantasies.

A patient and I spoke today about her fantasies, or more accurately about her lack of them and how important fantasies can be in keeping up one’s interest in sex. Part of the reason she doesn’t think she can get what she wants in her fantasy is that she believes she is unattractive by common …

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Fantasies.

Most women don’t feel comfortable sharing their sexual fantasies. In fact, many say they don’t even have them. There is some notion that one should fantasize about their boyfriend or husband only, and that fantasies should be fairly tame and not involve anything out of the ordinary. In fact, the beauty of a fantasy is …

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Sharing your fantasies with your partner…

I often am asked by women if they “should” share their sexual fantasies with their partner. Sometimes they want to but are afraid and sometimes they feel like they “should” because their partner is asking them to.   My only advice is that the decision to do so should be totally up to you alone. …

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