When you’re heart is broken — keep it open.

Everyone will suffer a broken heart at one point in their life. Whether it is the death of a relative, friend, pet or even a relationship.  Endings can hurt like hell. Our hearts may feel heavy and broken, as if it has crumbled into bits and pieces. There is a brighter side to heart break …

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After the affair: sex again?

Freud once said that when two people make love, there are six people in bed — the couple and their parents. After an affair, add a seventh: the ghost of the lover. Here are some ideas to help you pull your parents and the lover out from under the covers, warm up the space between you, …

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Fishing for the right answers.

I recently met a woman complaining of a long history of painful intercourse. Several years ago she finally had the courage to tell her doctor about it. The doctor responded by recommending that she go see a therapist. The woman met with a therapist and was asked all the typical intake questions. When the therapist …

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Do beautiful people have better sex lives?

No! Really. Trust me. So look here. Yes, I suppose that beautiful people get picked up in bars and supermarkets more than less attractive ones but I don’t think in the end that matters one whit. Some beautiful people are very sexual. Some are not. People who are less beautiful by media standards seem to …

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Joyce Walder: Trust, intimacy and connection.

We see single women of all ages here at MCFS. I am a huge proponent of on line dating at any age. Often, when I suggest it to women, they will say they feel anxious, insecure, or not ready. I try to encourage them to feel good about themselves and to realize that most men …

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YES! Hormonal contraception can cause painful intercourse.

I see many patients that come to the office complaining of painful intercourse and one of my first questions is: Are you taking birth control pills or any other form of hormonal contraception? And if so, for how long? Now, the information I’m about to provide includes all hormonal contraception like the nuvaring, patch, injections …

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Sex and Chinese food.

The other day I was talking to a patient who originally came in for the treatment of low desire and painful intercourse. A few months into her treatment, her relationship with her husband has transformed and she is feeling more satisfied in her marriage as a result. When we were discussing her progress, she said …

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What does low desire look like?

We see women all the time with “low desire.” Some practitioners are confused by “low desire” because how can you measure the absence of something? And how does a woman know if her low desire is a problem? Women who at one time had a strong desire for sex are more likely to be able …

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Estrogen replacement: horse urine vs yams.

Women have a lot of choices these days when it comes to estrogen replacement. There are many products on the market and oftentimes more choices lead to more confusion. Estrogen delivery systems include oral pills, transdermal patches, gels, rings and injections. Some estrogen products are made from the urine of pregnant horses and others are …

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Vulnerability, shame & sex.

One of the toughest parts of talking to people about sex is how often shame comes up. Shame is such a complicated thing because it is a part of all of us and yet as humans we inherently don’t want to go near it. As a therapist, this is a big challenge because I might …

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