Religion and sex.

Some religions think sex is a sin. Many do not. The frustrating thing is that even religions which do not have this view seem to have adopted aspects of this way of thinking. And it’s even more frustrating when people who do not consider themselves religious somehow absorb the idea that sex is sinful. Why? …

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“When Sex Seems Impossible.”

At the Center, I frequently see patients suffering from vaginismus. Vaginismus is a “female sexual dysfunction,” specifically a genital pain disorder. Vaginismus is defined by involuntary spasms of the vaginal muscles which interfere with sexual intercourse. It goes without saying that this condition causes distress and tension in a couple’s relationship. In my search to …

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Your partner is fine.

Your partner is FINE We are always amused when patients assume that the reason they can’t reach orgasm through intercourse is because they don’t have a skillful partner, or that somehow their partner doesn’t try hard enough. At the Center, we are well aware of the fact (and you see it all the time in …

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Mind reading.

We often think that our partners should be mind readers. We hope that they will intuit what we need and then give us that thing in the way we would like to get it. That is rarely the case. In truth, you need to teach someone how to love you. I hear our patients say,” …

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When it comes to sex, lying is not a good idea!

Yesterday we saw a wonderful patient of ours. She originally came in because she felt like “there was something wrong with her.” She was having a difficult time having orgasms and, more often than not, she could not have them with a partner. We’ve worked with her for a while to help her understand that …

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Birth control: what doctors never tell you.

If a patient comes to us with low desire or low arousal, one of the first questions we ask is, “Are you on birth control pills?” The reason we ask this is because oral contraceptives can wreak havoc on your system and can be particularly detrimental to your sexual desire. Yaz tends be the worst …

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How much information is too much when it comes to sex?

A highly respected university professor just got into trouble when he had a live couple demonstrate use of a vibrator in front of his human sexuality class. According to the times the woman wanted to demonstrate female ejaculation. Wow. This certainly leads to many interesting questions and to be fair I’m just starting to think …

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Embracing the masculine and the feminine.

I recently heard a lecture about the history of sexuality. The lecturer said he thought the greatest lovers of all times had a strong mix of masculine and feminine qualities. He cited Catherine the Great, Cleopatra, Marc Antony and Casanova. The men possessed a strong feminine side and the women a strong masculine side. At …

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Turn that dial up.

Recently, researchers conducted a study on sexual desire in men and women. The results are of great interest to us and the work that we do here at the Center. Male and female subjects, individually, were asked to watch two movies while they were connected to devices designed to measure blood flow to the genitals, …

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